Chronic Pain and Sexual Intimacy: Giving and Getting the Pleasure That's Deserved

50 million people in the United States are living with chronic pain. But these large numbers can just be unfeeling stats on a page and it can be tough to understand exactly what that looks like. To help, check out this web page that shows you what one million dots look like. Now, multiply that by 50 million. It's still kind of incomprehensible.

The point is: people with chronic pain are around us, they are us, they are our spouses, our friends, our partners, the person in your office you flirt with, etc.

Chronic pain is common and can affect anyone at any time. Therefore, if you aren’t already familiar with how to deal with someone (on an intimate level) in chronic pain, it’s time you figured it out.

If you are living with chronic pain, we got you. Your intimate pleasure is something that shouldn’t give you anxiety.

While those who are living with chronic pain are hard to treat and they sometimes push through tough times, they are still dealing with life—of which sex is a big part. The CDC reports that anxiety and depression play key roles in addressing and dealing with it. One can cause the other or the other can be symptoms to a physical problem that is causing the chronic pain. If you or someone with whom you are intimate is suffering from chronic pain, don’t give up—on your sex life or anything else. There is help available.

It is in that spirit that we present some tools that will assist you in giving and getting the pleasure you want, need and deserve.

Educate yourself and partners with some helpful reading

As the old adage says, knowledge is power. Check out the Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability written by a doctor, a sex educator and a disability advocate. They didn’t walk into a bar together, but they did put together this astounding publication that covers everything from dealing with self-esteem issues to working around fatigue and pain during physical acts. It also discusses how to incorporate sex toys even if you aren’t familiar with them and are feeling a bit….unsure.

Put control back in your own hands

The Mimic Vibrator has been ergonomically designed  for your use and can assist you if you experience limited mobility or cramping in your hands. Its super adorable design makes using a toy a little less intimidating and can even be used on your neck or other parts of the body. And that pretty shade of turquoise blue makes you feel like you’re treating yourself. Just like you should.

A soothing muscle rub with a secret weapon

Never underestimate the power of a simple touch or massage. With Bella CBD Crema Elegante or Bella CBD Massage Oil, infused with 250mg of CBD oil, you’ll feel the tension and pain start to melt away, naturally. CBD—derived from the cannabis plant—does not contain THC. If you’re straight edge or wary of dipping your toe into the world of cannabis, no worries. Use it for a typical massage or to get in the mood and connect with your partner.

This simple, effective and downright fun tool

The Magic Wand Original has been assisting women and couples for at least three decades. So, you can pretty much trust that it’s tried and true. This massager has a straightforward design to get to the right spot. No frills, no bling and no complications, the wand massager is there for one job and it does it well. Kind of like the boyfriend that you always wanted. OK, just kidding, but it sure is handy.

Remember, be kind to yourself. There is an enormous community out here rooting for you. You just have to look in the right places.